Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Two Quizes in Twenty Minutes

I just had a truly terrifying experience. I looked at my schedule this morning suddenly realizing that there would be a quiz at the beginning of the class. So I decided to be on time. As I sat down, I looked to make sure I was sitting next to the most bodacious woman. And I got out my pen and turned off my iPod. And I looked around and saw that everyone was reading a copy of a story by Benjiman Franklin and I thought oh great they must have put something up on oncourse and I did not get it. I didn't even check. (bare in mind this is an art history class - renaissance) so I think well Benjiman Franklin was a Renaissance man I suppose. And so I get out my phone and check oncourse. Well the server is jammed and I can't connect. So I'm like ok this is alright I'll just wing it. I know about old ben, a penny saved and all that, catheder, illegitimate children ok I got this. Then the ai comes in and it is not the normal ai. And I think, well swine flu is going around and the university is really pressuring instructors to stay home so I say must be a sub. And then he passes out the quiz. Four questions. First question, what did Benjiman Franklin put on his chart to show he made a fault? Ok easy, a check mark. It's a guess but it makes some sense. Question two, Benjiman Franklin wrote of a man that bought an ax, what did the man decide to think at the end? Oooookkkkaaaayyy, he decided that he didn't actually need to use the ax. I'm doing gooooooood. Question three, who did Mark Weber say was the example of a "essential capitalist"? ............. Thomas Jefferson? Why have I never heard about any of this in class!?! Then I look around and realize that I don't recognize a single person in this class. Am I in the wrong class? I look at the top of the paper. Section number L241.....hmmm......my class number is what? A102? I'm in the wrong class. Ai says there is 5 minutes left on the quiz, as rolling stones would say, should I stay or should I go now? I check my schedule again, I'm in the wrong room, I go to this room tomorrow.
So I decide to fold up the quiz, get up, not say a word, not look at anybody, and just leave. I arrive at my proper class I walk into the lecture hall, the professor says we are on the essay portion, start there. The exam says describe the image. I've never seen this image before in my life!!! I look at the two previous questions to gain some sort of context. Some glimmer of hope. The question is a list. Title, artist, date, etc. THAT DOESNT HELP!!! HOW WOULD I EVEN KNOW THOSE ANSWERS!!!
So I wing it.
Two quizes in twenty minutes.