Friday, December 7, 2007

sometimes its worth it. sometimes you just have to endure. for no reason really, you just have to.

I think that I sometimes endure just to endure and then I find the inspiration in the small places.

we need simplicity sometimes.

I try to imagine myself in different phases of my life sometimes. I think its a form of predicting the future.

We are doing a little better then yesterday probly.

Tuesday, November 27, 2007

What is real nigga?

Would you rather live in the real world or the matrix?

Is the real world like our real world or like the real world in the matrix?

Matrix real world. But you're on the real world in the matrix real world.

Like on the show real world but in the matrix at the same time?

Yup. Exactly but the catch is that your the only one who was aware of it.

Alright so on the real world matrix the six other stangers had no clue they were in the matrix but I Knew. So then could I manipulate the matrix?


Well then fo shizzal.

Good man.

Would you rather be ignorant in the matrix or purebred in Zion?

Depends. Would I be the one, or morpheus caliber, if I was in the real world?

No you'd be completely oblivious.

Purebred in Zion for sure.

Yeah keep it real.

You've got to. *Umph* all about the struggle man.

Saturday, November 24, 2007

Meeting Hayden Panettiere

Have you ever wondered what it would be like to meet a celebrity and what you might say if you did? I would probably try to whistle for a while if it was a girl. I mean how often do you meet someone that's so famous that they would have someone like me make a blog that features them?

Don't I know you from somewhere?

I don't think we've met.

Aren't you that little girl from andre?

I don't think I've heard of that show.

That's a lovely fragrance you're wearing.

I'm not wearing anything.

Let me guess, phoenix? Orion?

Are those axe body spray's?

You're right, I'm wearing phoenix, and orion.


Please, let me buy you a drink.

That's O.K.-

Bartender! One water for the lady, no icccceeeee!

I'm meeting someone, I should go.

Will I ever see you again?

That depends.

On what?

If you believe never means ever in which case-actually its just easier to leave.

Saturday, November 17, 2007

Race in the Place

:Man, I love being black!

:How racist would it sound if you were white and said man I love being white?

:Not at all. Unless you think racial pride is racist, which it isn't.

:Pride always merits prejudice. Don't get me wrong, I love being mixed and I love mixed women but I'm sayin society makes it wrong for white people to be proud.

:You don't get where I'm coming from. There is nothing wrong of being proud to be Irish or polish or German is there?

:There's nothing wrong with patriotism or respect for origin but its the skin color that creates subterfuge.

:Well that's because after the first world war in the USA it wasn't cool to be proud of your individual European race. Instead it became fashionable to become American. Which mean that different white nationalists became mixed into being white America...And we all know the results of that.



:That's a big word... You see I have problems with the word pride. High Society has changed its meaning but failed in changing the affects of having pride. Its as if the word wears a mask. People want it to mean respect for and care and gratitude. But I feel we must not use the word pride for those things because one word does not give care and gratitude and respect for each individual meaning but rather unmasks itself as the culprit of all prejudice.

:I hear ya man.

Thursday, November 1, 2007

I Remember You

This is something a wrote at the end of last week. It started as a rap, then turned into a poem, then became something else. Its about meeting yourself, physically.

I think about going back in time some time
to reflect on how I've changed with time and in mind
I hardly ever think if I could only hit rewind
I'd change the way I act but instead I find
that if I stood face to face with my own face
I would only find judgment and perhaps disgrace.
I never thought about being 22 nor did I taste
the cusp of adulthood nor this state nor this place
If I saw myself as a five year old boy what would I say?
would I pull the skin on my face back tight, would I say
yeah you still look like me yet rough, you alright? would I say
I thought I'd be taller or would I stand in awe of who I am today.
If I saw myself as a ten year old would I give myself advice
would I say be good, don't cheat, and don't lie, there's wisdom in being nice.
would I reach out and embrace or would I stand still studiously, would that suffice?
Could I have any affect on the path I lead, could I change it, what's the price?
Would that change affect the 15 year old now standing before me
is he still shy, quiet and depressed? or does he see me and resent me?
Does he still wish I were taller? is he ok with the strength of my body?
Is he surprised that I still have no girlfriend? or not surprised, that's iffy.
"I remember you," I would say. "I've seen you in my dreams I think," he replies.
"why have you come here?" asks my pubescent me.
Then I stare and examine again, just as I did with my 10 year old me.
"That girl you like, she'll be married by the time you're my age, not to me."
Then that would test the person that I'd visit, who is 20.
Before I looked as a father to a son, but now I see someone who's mighty.
Clean and strong, well spoken, wise beyond his years, its frightening.
From him I would expect the harshest judgment of all
but what I find is love and admiration, kindness and understanding
He seeks to understand me, He realizes that I am more
than I think I am, he realizes that I have a divine potential to become
the person that God wants me to be and he trusts and encourages me on.
Part of me thinks, 20 year old me is naive still but
no, no he's not because he remembers and knows who he is.

Saturday, October 27, 2007

Why Devin the Dude?

So I went to the Del show last night and it was good, there was Knobody and A Plus and Junk Science and it was real good, but the night took a weird turn when Devin the Dude and Coughee Brothaz came up on the stage. I guess I'm out of some loop, because I had know idea who they were but they were really popular with almost everyone there, but they were terrible. I mean I'm not one to really enjoy that dirty south, tick tick tick beat but then coupled with way to many people on stage and two topic sets (weed and vagina) and then it seemed like they played the whole discography, I don't know I was just expecting something different from a venue which in whole is suppos't to be some of that old school stuff. It was like everyone had something to say and then the Coughee Brothaz showed all the ladies what their vagina's were made for.

But here's the thing, not withstanding my extreme distaste for devin the dude and the coughee brothaz, I kept thinking, if they look down and see that I'm not feelin it and they call me out on it I would really tell them that they were tight because I'm sure they would take me out back and beat me.

But all in all Del was tight. and today the secret agents won, that's my basketball team.

Thursday, October 25, 2007

The ForeEar

Last night I saw this dude who put a prosthetic ear on his forearm, an artist named stelarc, and one more reason why I am convinced that white people are crazy. Who puts an ear on their forearm? and I touched the dang ear too, it felt like cartilage.

Today I got a little stressed out because of this lady. She kept walking into our work space when we least expected her to and she kept hearing the wrong part of our conversation and so now she tries to hint at getting a good deal from us on our paint job. Well one day joey was in there and she walked in thinking it was me and she said "hey boy" trying to get my attention, but then she realized it was joey. Joey later recounted this to me at which point I informed him that that was a racist remark. He replied "I thought it might be but wasn't sure." I then told him it was how slave owners addressed their slaves. He then agreed it was a racist comment.

white people, the reason they built projects was not to help impoverished black people have shelter but rather to provide shelter for themselves outside the parameter of black social groups. And it was the Scientologists that made this idea up too because they wanted everything to be like battlefield earth where john travolta and forest whitticker try to get the black people (or in the analogy of the movie/book, people) to get all the gold for them. Well maybe they thought they could fix the mistakes of the book or maybe they thought that it was some sort of self fulfilling prophecy, but short story long, its going to back fire, because black people are moving to the suburbs too, like my family. and the mixed family next to us, but they fit the stereotype a little better than we do.

Curses Tom Cruise, curses.

Monday, October 22, 2007

Post numero uno

This is my first blog on blogger, (sounds like frogger, prolly doesn't have a crossing the road complex like frogger though) I think i've done two or three blogs on myspace but I'm tired of getting myspace emails.

so today I had class, and my teacher who happens to be japanese gave me this book of the hayao miyazaki museum because I did a plaster sculpture that reminded her of his work. After i thought about it, it seemed to resemble those little wood spirits in princess mononoke. You know the ones that are really cute and cuddley from afar but up close their heads start rattling and you think eww. The book she gave me was in japanese and she said "I know its in japanese so you probably can't read it" to which I replied "nihonguga wakarimas" which was a lie. Then I though "oh is this this guy's house?", then I realised it was a museum. but then I got all inspired and junk, and thought to myself, I'm going to make my house a huge piece of art.

man artist are stupid.